amalia fonfara

visual artist and shamanic practitioner

Date: 6/5 2014 Subject (T)

Subject (T)´ Note

“in the beginning I got very aware of my mass, not necessarily the body with its boundaries, but the heaviness in it.

the hands left cold prints which remained a while, this must have changed (its temperature), because I only remembered it in the beginning. then it was like the hands unfolded me; got my hands and feet to move out, down; in this twitching-like, mechanical way; automatically. in the beginning it was hard for me to disconnect myself, the thoughts came more than they left, but when mother came and reached out her arms towards me – obviously this image would come to me, I had almost assumed that, but still it stunned me! – everything became quiet. and bright. in the exact moment we would meet in a hug, hands were put on my arms and it felt like it was then it began.

afterwards I remember everything much more unclear.

a physical hart burning in my chest. like a hot stone.

to become aware of a third rhythm. not the heartbeats, nor the breaths, but some kind of lightpulse.. yellow-green.

and I spinned around my own shoulder again. earlier it had happened backwards over the left shoulder, then I had always been completely exhausted afterwards. now it was more sporadic, not as consistent, but occasionally it went ahead anyway. it woke some kind of elation.

the last thing I remember; I see a big ferry on the high seas in the horizon. clam, light evening, possibly morning.

and then it is like I walk through a half transparent membrane, like a mounted plastic sheet, only more organic. I only got to wonder upon this before it was over. at first I felt incredibly long. long, light and compact without really being heavy.”